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Everyone Needs a Ride or Die Friend

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I think everyone needs one person. I have been blessed for over three-fourths of my life to have two. I was lucky to meet them in the fifth grade when my Dad's job in the Air Force relocated us after the Christmas break. Lucky for me, because I was a new kid at a new school.

I am not sure what drew these two snot-nosed kids to me, but I know I was fortunate to have instant friends. As a military kid, that was not lost on me.

And here we are, several decades later, still thick as thieves. Sure, our friendship has gone through ebbs n flows, at times being in each other daily lives while other times far less frequent. But one thing remains. We've committed to being the ride or die kind of friends. And here is what makes our friendship stick:

• Your person is your truth teller.

• Your person, no-questions-asked, joins you in shenanigan after shenanigan, no matter how dumb it may seem.

• Your person tells you when you are being a butthole. And holds you accountable when you are wrong.

•Your person is your ride or die. She will do all the things. You are her jam and she is yours.

• Your person thinks nothing of sharing her favorite dress, hairspray, lip gloss, or last twenty dollar bill.

• Your person laughs at your jokes, even when they're not funny. She will bust-a-gut over the inside antics and crack-up at any reference to aforementioned shenanigan.

• Your person answers the phone at 2 AM, no matter what, promptly returns urgent texts, and won't be mad when you can't return hers.

• Your person understands that during certain seasons, life gets busy, so she won't hold a grudge when you have to say no more than you can say yes. She forgives. She shows you grace. She doesn't keep score.

• Your person happily joins you on the dance floor, milliseconds after your favorite 80's song comes on. And she won't leave until you are done shaking your booty, even if her feet are killing her from her white pumps.

• Your person is willing to compromise, forfeit her turn, and will battle anyone who dares to wrong you.

• Your person serves as a lifeline and a cheerleader. But, more importantly, she isn't afraid to call you on your shit. And in the very next breath, she'll sing your praises from the highest mountaintop.

• Your person loves you, warts and all, accepting all your imperfections. She holds you in the highest esteem but also shows you an abominable amount of grace when you royally mess up. She also tells you when you have a booger and when your hair looks bad.

• Your person, if you are lucky, will grow old while growing wise with you. Through deaths, marriages, births, divorces, cancers, surgeries, failures, joys, gray hairs and wrinkles, she is there...still riding.

• Your person knows that having you as her person is one of life's greatest blessings; My person(s) certainly have been mine.

I imagine us as old women still engaged in silly group text messages or sharing our hearts. More than likely the dynamics will continue to ebb and flow. But one thing will remain. They will always be my people. My ride or die.

Written by Valli Vida Gideons on


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