I hear it all the time. "Trust your mom instincts." And before last week, I didn't really understand.
Why wouldn't I trust my instincts when it comes to Ava's livelihood?
Of course we all want what's best for our kids but for some reason, we're scared. We're scared of making the wrong choice, scared of being judged, scared of being too protective. We don't want to be "that mom" that the entire doctor's office knows because we bring our child in for each and every scratch.
Until last week, I never felt that. Until one person really made me feel terrible for trusting my instinct...
And you'll never guess who it was.
We came home from a weekend away in Palm Springs and Ava was being very fussy. She was screaming and crying and wouldn't stop and typically, that's nothing my boob can't handle. But in this case it was different. She didn't want my boob and there was nothing we could do to calm her down.
We checked her fingers and toes for hairs that may have wrapped around them (if you haven't heard of that, look it up!) and then decided to take her temperature as a precaution, even though she didn't feel even a little warm.
No way! It must be a user error. -- 95.5, 96.1, 95.7.
We couldn't get a temperature above 96 degrees so of course we immediately did what every parent does.
We Googled, of course.
Unfortunately our dear friend Google didn't provide any answers this time, good or bad, so we left a voicemail for the pediatrician and called the nurse hotline.
The nurse asked us all of the usual questions, had us take her rectal temperature which still didn't provide a normal temperature and seemed to have little knowledge on what could be wrong. So we decided to keep a close eye on her overnight.
As the next morning rolled around, she was acting totally normal - her bubbly, happy self. But her pediatrician's office wanted her to come in "just to be safe." Her pediatrician wasn't there that day so we saw a doctor we had never seen before and will absolutely, positively never see again.
Long story short: He made me feel like a complete idiot of a mother for even considering something could be wrong with my precious baby.
"Obviously both of your thermometers have bad batteries."
"You should never have brought her in for a low temperature unless she was about to die."
Really? This doctor made me feel as though I had completely wasted his time. He made me feel like a complete idiot of a parent and made me second guess my decision to spend an hour of my day getting her checked out.
Ava was fine and nothing was wrong and it could have potentially been a bad battery or user error. But then I thought to myself --
What if something actually had been terribly wrong and I had feared a doctor telling me that I had wasted their time? What if something was wrong with my baby that required immediate medical attention and I had feared someone judging me for being over protective?
Moral of the story:
Never second guess yourself and be over protective in every situation, because the alternative could potentially be a whole lot worse.
Trust those instincts, moms and dads, and never let anyone let you feel insecure for doing so.
For a split second I second-guessed my decision to "waste that doctor's time" over something that turned out to be nothing. But for the rest of Ava's life, I will continue to waste every doctor's time when there is even an ounce of a chance that something may be wrong. She is may baby and I am her mom. And her mommy and daddy know best!