Hi my friends!
I've been absent for a while- so much has happened! A new job: Teaching 4th-6th graders, a "Functional Skills" class (severe disabilities); attending my own university classes (oy vay), and oh yeah, getting divorced! So, sleep has been a distant friend. I've never been great at sleeping well since I started having children, and with 6 of those, it took a while to get them raised and removed as the reason I was awake. Still sleep has been a scarce commodity! But the other night I went outside while talking to my friend on the phone, and lay on the swing looking at stars while wrapped in a blanket. Amazingly, the stress melted away, and I felt the world falling into perspective. The following night, with jammies already changed into, face washed, teeth brushed and sans the phone, I went out again to lay back to look at the stars and contemplate my place in this universe. I guess I was surprised to find myself 'praying', and I'm sure some will relate this experience to meditating, but again, and even stronger this time, an amazing peace came over me. Mind you, I had to be there for a while. It didn't happen right away, but then I slipped into bed and fell asleep right away and STAYED asleep. I think in giving my worries a rest, and letting them fall into the hands of the ONE who has already taken those worries upon Himself- I was granted the peace I desperately need. Things are still hard, I'm still struggling to juggle all the balls in the air, but at my core- I have found that peace to buoy me up throughout the day. I return to it in quiet moments, or the most chaotic ones- like a touchstone it is there. And all because I looked to the heavens.