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Please stop telling us to 'soak it all in'

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Please stop telling us to ‘soak it all in.’

There is no more room in my brain, heart, or soul to take in one more bit of information. I’m maxed out. Tapped out. Done. Fried and a bit frazzled.

But I’m still a great mother.

I’ve told several friends lately that going back to school this year is worse that 2020. At least we had our footing last year. We were in the throws of masks, distancing, and virtual everything so when it came to back-to-school, we were essentially doing the same thing except in August.

This year is different.

I’m more nervous now. Decisions are different. There’s a bit more uncertainty in what lies ahead for us. We suddenly, after several moths of what felt like going back to normal, took a hard right turn and I now feel like I’m living in the upside down.

Please stop telling us to ‘soak it all in.’

As mothers, we often carry the mental load and this current load is really heavy. I’m not taking on one more thing.

My daughter started eighth grade this year and it never occurred to me that this was her last first day at her current school. I think my son has all of his supplies for fourth grade.

I’m a bit distracted lately and sometimes I miss something one of them says to me. I haven’t forgotten anything major but I’m certainly tired enough for it to happen.

But I’m still a great mother.

There so much pressure for things to be perfect. There’s too much pressure for mothers to watch, remember, and catalogue every waking moment and I’m here to say it’s too much.

My kids know how much I love them. Even on the days that we get by on autopilot. Some days my love is expressed by reminding them to wash their hands. Making dinner. Cracking jokes in the morning when I wake them up.

They know I love them even if I’m not savoring every moment. They know I love them even if I’m not soaking anything in except for the fact that we all made it through the day and are all home under the same roof.

Some days that is enough. Some days that is more than enough.

Hang in there, ya’ll. xo

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