I will never forget the day that we were told we could leave the hospital. I looked at my husband and was literally shaking. I was excited, nervous, exhausted and all sorts of other feelings all at the same time. We put my daughter in that car seat, oh my gosh she looked so tiny in that thing. We carried her downstairs, and a wonderful girl from the hospital helped us get her in the car, (my husband may have tried to but the car seat in backwards at first) Then the girl handed me a rose, said congratulations and we were off. OMG, what the heck were we going to do?!
We drive home, as slow as humanly possible. She was silent in the back and at one point my husband stopped and checked on her, just to be sure.
We get her home and I walk in the house with her car seat and I look at my husband and ask "Where can we set her?". I realized I didn't even know where the safe place to put her down was. Was the floor too cold, is the table too high? But we figured it out, without too much fuss and moved on.
Then, I remember calling my friend to ask if I could pee...yes, I mean it. My daughter was asleep in the swing but I was terrified that she would somehow pull out an amazing mid-air flip and fly out of that swing while I was in the bathroom. But she didn't, and again we were all fine.
I don't think anyone really can prepare for that moment. You may have babysat 50 kids, ran a daycare, or flew to space. You will never be prepared for that feeling of complete lack of knowledge.
My daughter is 18 months old now and carries on a full conversation with me, she plays, laughs, sleeps (sometimes), eats, loves bath time, and loves her family. Words cant express how much we love her back, through all of the muddling and crying (her and me). In the end it is all so worth it, and either way-you'll figure it out with no one too worse for the wear!!!