It’s Tuesday morning at 6:27 am. I’m in stealth-mode as I tiptoe through the kitchen, pour myself a cup of coffee, and slip outside the door. My husband lifts one eye as I slide past him, nodding in solidarity as I make my escape. The kids are fast asleep and, as I close the door behind me, I exhale.

It’s no secret in my family that I’m career driven. In fact, my husband and I are all about celebrating both of our professional successes, and in imparting the value of hard work in and outside of our home to our girls. My kids, though, aren’t always fully on-board. Don’t get me wrong. Sometimes they blurt out, “My mom’s a doctor and a writer and hosts a podcast and…” to random restaurant waiters before we can jump in with a comment about something a little less braggadocios. Other times, just like all children, they wail when I leave for my office, or tell me things like, “All the other kids’ moms will be at the birthday party (at 3 pm on a Wednesday afternoon). Why can’t you?”

Mom guilt is, whether we like it or not, part of working mom life, right alongside social and institutional bias, time constraints, and a little chaos. There are times I use mom guilt as data from my children about their very real needs. I re-arrange my schedule to make sure they’re appropriately prioritized. Other situations call for balanced discussions around why mommy works and how she cares about making a difference at her job and in her family. Sometimes, though, the right thing to do is to hide.

Pre-coronavirus, I might have hung out in a coffee shop or even gone to my pediatrics office to work when my kids were at home and I didn’t want to be. When the pandemic began, though, I found I could set up shop just as easily for meetings perched on the back bench with the driver’s seat moved as far forward as possible, parked under a tree with my phone as a hotspot and my car charger at the ready. In between meetings I’d drive to the post office and drop off a package, or go grab some take out lunch at a local café.

My business team thought it was a funny joke at first. “You’re in your car again?” they’d chide me. “I know,” I’d half smile. Nowhere else to go to hide from my little ones.”

Soon though, I realized that using the car as a mobile office on my non-clinical days was working well for me. I started owning that it was how I juggled my work and my personal to-do list throughout the week without a whole lot of stress or wasted time.

Today, I used my car hideaway to write a blog post, coordinate with my marketing strategist, and encourage moms DM to DM about the struggles they’re facing finding success in all facets of their life without experiencing major burnout. I also drove my car to a park and listened to some Dua Lipa while I ate lunch on the grass. It’s all meaningful to me and it all feels right.

Here are 5 other ways you can build efficiency into your work and home life with less stress and more satisfaction.

Batch To-dos

Instead of spending all week thinking about what you need to get done to make your life happen, take a chunk of time to make a plan. A half hour should work just fine to organize your day or your week (maybe less once you get really used to this method). Then, set aside another hour or 2 to, in 1 sitting, try to move through as much as possible on your list. If you’re still not done once the timer goes off, plan another 2-hour chunk in a few days. Compartmentalizing our to-dos reduces our mental load, allowing us to be more mindful throughout the day.

Refuse to Equate Chores and Errands with Self-care

Sometimes I take a vacation day, and I spend every minute of it running errands for my family. Usually, by the time 5:00 pm rolls around, I feel tired and grumpy. I often wish I had just gone to work. At the very least, I feel disappointed and wistful about how I used my time. Errands are a necessary evil, but don’t get them confused with quality moments alone or with your loved ones. I manage to get most of my checklist items crossed off without lifting a metaphorical finger. You can too (hint: the next 3 tricks are the key to my success).

Off-load the Tasks That Drive You Crazy (or That You Don’t Do Well)

I’m not always good at cleaning my house. So, I hired some- one who is, to take care of the number 1 task I don’t need or want to do. Hiring a house cleaner reduced my stress, forced me to organize my house the night before she arrived each week, and gave me back my precious time, so I could spend it on more important things, like anything else.

I’m also not great at cooking weekday meals other than spaghetti and meatballs or chicken teriyaki out of a freezer bag. I shine when it comes to holiday meal extravaganzas, but my husband is a weekday wiz in the kitchen. Since he and I both know I would probably succumb to takeout every night if he didn’t cook consistently (and because we keep working at being parenting teammates), he wears the chef’s hat in our home most Mondays through Thursdays.

Automate

Remember, you are not the only person who can take care of your home, your kids, your bills, or your calendar. The running list of tasks that fills your mind all day long — the appointments you need to make, the dry cleaning you need to take in, the groceries you need to buy— is unhealthy, and it steals away your ability to focus on the here and now. One way to reduce your mental load is to simplify the number of tasks you have, either by getting rid of them or by delegating them to someone else. For the tasks you have to attend to, reduce your time thinking about them by automating.

Thank goodness we live in a modern world where, for a small fee, we can automate almost everything we do. I would wither on the vine if it were not for autopay and internet grocery and household goods delivery services. Diapers, wipes, sippy cups, household items like paper towels, hand soap, and toilet paper— I get them all from online ordering. I do not want to spend my time in a big-box store for basics. Wholesale grocery shopping in person gives me a headache. The regular grocery store is not much better. It’s fun to pick out something to add to our family meals or to carefully select a few specialty items when I’m out and about, but using my “me time” to head solo to the store wastes my time. Hauling 2 little people around as I try to shop is also less than ideal.

Instead, I order groceries and household goods every week using online apps and have them delivered to my home within 2 hours. Look for sales or free shipping to help lower the cost. My bills are all on autopay. I shop online for kids’ clothes, focusing on quality basics that can be handed down child to child, when possible. I would rather spend a little more money but only have to shop 4 times a year (with some fun, “let’s get a special outfit” outings sprinkled in) than pay less per item and have the clothes last less than a month. Another good tip is to shop the clearance racks and pick some items for your child for the next season. This requires a bit of a guessing game on sizing, but a little bigger is usually a good move. I have go-to sites I use regularly for clothing and shoes, so I’m familiar with the sizing and fit — both for my kids and for myself. This is very budget dependent, but, especially if you have multiple kids and they are the same gender, buying quality over quantity makes a big difference.

Use the Car to Strategically Multitask, even if You Don’t Use It as a Personal Office

The car is your friend, even if it’s not your full-on office like it is mine. Research shows that multitasking generally decreases our productivity, but, in the car, the same rules don’t always apply. The car can be a place to get a lot accomplished in a short period of time.

“I get some of my best work done riding in the passenger seat on family vacations,” says working mother Kara, a mom of 2 and a teacher. “I pay bills, research vacation spots, and sign my kids up for swimming lessons. It’s like the car creates this special little bubble where creative thinking and strategizing somehow becomes easier.”

I’m in full agreement. I think I wrote about half of my first book, The New Baby Blueprint: Caring for You and Your Little One, riding shotgun in a car, and most of my blog ideas come to me while I journal on longer trips. Something magical happens when you have your headphones in, your partner is listening to sports radio, and you have no other distractions.

Decide Doing What Matters is More Important Than Doing It All

Efficiency makes a different. Our work environments can make our days more pleasant. Single-tasking makes you more productive. That said, when we believe the world’s lie that we should or can do everything well—when we put too much on our proverbial check lists in the first place—we fail. Instead, focus on doing a few things well, the things that are in alignment with your priorities, and find ways to push the rest of life’s clutter further to the edges of your centered vision for your life.

Knock, knock, knock. It’s the sound of my four-year-old at the car window as I pull up to our house at the end of the day. “Mommy’s home!” she squeals. I give her the biggest hug, pulling her up into my arms and spinning her around.

“Where were you today mommy?”

I smile at her, happy to be in this moment with her now, content with how I’ve spent the last 6 hours.

“Baby girl, I was on a mission.”

“A mission?” Her eyes get wide. She wants in, too.

“Yep, a secret mission. One day, I’ll tell you all about it.”

My husband and I exchange mischievous eye-to-eye top secret mission high fives. “Get ready for some messy fun. It’s your day here tomorrow,” he laughs.

After I lock the car (I mean my office) door, we all head into the evening—feeling free and happy and very satisfied with our version of work-life balance—together.

This is a modified excerpt from The Working Mom Blueprint: Winning at Parenting Without Losing Yourself.