When you woke up this morning, was it business as usual?
For most of us, I'm sure it was.
But, for some, it wasn't, and it won't be for a while.
And for those, I pray.
In the first few days, weeks, even months after my dad passed, everything was a struggle.
I'd get dressed and wonder why.
What was the point of changing clothes?
I'd go to put my makeup up and feel like a self-obsessed idiot.
What was the point of wearing mascara? How could I care how I look at a time like this?
I'd eat, and nothing would taste good.
I'd watch the tv, but not really watch the tv.
I'd conversate without letting any of it actually penetrate.
I was sad, mad, confused, mad, sad, mad, confused.
You get it.
I was a fragile shell of the girl I was just days, weeks, and months before.
It's been almost seven years since I unexpectedly lost my dad, and while I will grieve the loss of his physical presence forever, I carry him with me wherever I go.
The thing is, though, on any given day, you have no idea what another person lost
a loved one or ones,
who or what they are carrying
lost loved ones,
and the like.
So tread lightly, be kind to everyone and remember that the interactions you have with people matter.
And, if you’re anything like me, who, despite being fully aware of the fleeting nature of life, still rushed and raised her voice at her loved ones this morning, just remember, you can do better.
I will do better.
I will listen and really hear.
I will watch and really see.
I will hug longer and harder.
I will live each minute with purpose.
And, I will love like there’s no tomorrow.
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