Recently my daughter had a dress rehearsal for her first dance recital.
In a sea of teal and pink costumes it was easy to spot that her classmate was not dressed in her recital outfit.
But, she was there.
She received her award.
And, she had her picture taken (smiling) with her mom.
The mom messaged me later on in the day to ask if we had received our tickets in the mail.
She (on her own) explained how she thought dress rehearsal was a different day.
How she has so much going on that she can’t keep everything straight.
That she felt like such a bad mom.
I listened and offered a few words of encouragement.
What I really wanted to say was this.
Come sit at my table ANY day.
You are more than welcome here.
You see I mess up as a mom. A lot.
This past week I dropped my son off at school. There was nothing in the house to eat for lunch because our order was still at Target pickup. I promised him I would drop off lunch. Then work called. Do you know when I remembered lunch? The first time lunch crossed my mind?! When I was walking up to pick him up from the END of school. Yep, thankfully the school gave him lunch that day.
We went to my girlfriend’s house last week for an impromptu playdate. I swore my daughter’s shoes were in the car. When we arrived she was shoeless. I carried her into the back yard and basically said “a decision was made”. A decision to turn around and grab shoes making it too late to stop by. Or, for her to join the other (thankfully) shoeless children running around in the grass. But, I was (that mom). The one who brings her kid somewhere with no shoes on.
I could go on.
I have a lot of parenting fails.
Like, how we showed up for dance pictures without the order form. And, without money.
I am doing the best I can in an extraordinarily challenging situation.
Some of us (me included) need to read that line over and over.
The best we can in an extraordinarily challenging situation.
Sometimes, I give myself grace.
Most of the time - I do not.
I know all too well the sinking feeling of “failing as a parent” of being a “bad mom”.
But guess what?
You were there.
You showed up.
In extraordinarily challenging times.
You. Showed. Up.
I hope when children look back they remember that.
I hope they remember the flaws and hard times and who showed up despite it all. ❤️