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Challenge: I Feel Bad About...

To My Son-Together We Are Perfectly Imperfect

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I'm your mom. I'm not perfect. There was a time though that it was so much easier to convince you otherwise. It was me and you against the world. I wasn't perfect then either, but my mistakes felt smaller. Maybe I forgot to warm the bottle enough. Perhaps I forgot to give you fruit with breakfast. Maybe I rolled my eyes when you cried for me instead of Daddy for the sixth night in a row. You didn't know that though. You didn't see my mistakes. You didn't hear my regrets. You were little and so were our problems.

Now you are older. You are aware. You are smart. You are also more forgiving than I give you credit for. I want to wrap up the world and give it to you. I want to shield you from harm. I want to protect you from every mean word that may ever be thrown your way. I want to help you grow and become everything you want to be one day. Sometimes while doing that I over step. Sometimes I say things I regret. Sometimes I take a step back and realize that while I thought I was being an encouraging mom, I was really just being a force that wound up deflating you. I never want to deflate you, not ever.

You see I'm your mom and I'm not perfect, but you, you are one of my most perfect accomplishments. No matter what you do in life, I will be proud of you. I promise. I promise that just like I ask of you, I will watch my words. I promise I will always be honest with you and ask you to do the same. I promise to build you up, and protect you while giving you the tools to navigate the tough situations on your own. I promise to apologize when I mess up. I promise to learn from my mistakes. I promise that perfection is not ours to chase. Above everything I promise to be your mom. I promise to know that silence can be just as powerful as words, and I promise to know that no matter how old you are, sometimes a hug and a kiss on the nose is all that is needed. We are perfectly imperfect, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

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