I have a serious question…
Why do I connect better with my kids one day and then the next day it is a total flop?
I haven’t figure it out yet and, to be honest, I feel I probably never will.
Maybe the days of connected bliss is when we seek love, rather than push love away?
Maybe the days we can barely enter a room, without the tension cutting through the space, is when we grasp at independence while also wanting to be coddled?
It’s hard to go about the days though, with a confident heart, when the tug of the push and the pull and the yin and the yang come barreling at us.
Consistency… this is what I long for.
But I have realized consistency is a very high expectation within the job of being a mom.
No matter the age of our children, motherhood is not going to be consistent.
It’s going to knock our socks off one day and wrap us up in love the following day.
It’s going to make us smile, until our cheeks hurt, and the next moment force us to escape, to our car, to cry tears of frustration.
It’s going to make us feel giddy, simply by glancing over at our children, and show us a level of heartache we never knew existed.
Even though my anxious heart may feel I’m not connecting as well with my children, some days, I have to remain confident we are growing, learning and loving one another, side by side.
On the hard days, where we may not feel in sync with one another, it’s okay to have space.
It’s okay to spend some quiet time alone to then regroup later, maybe over a bowl of ice cream.
No relationship is perfect and often annoyances or frustrations get the best of us but there is a time to forgive and move forward together.
It’s okay to allow hard times to enter in and accept and embrace those moments just as much as the triumphs because life is just this.
Life is filled with moments of pure elation and moments of utter disappointment all wrapped into one.
So friends, if today is one of those days, and for whatever reason your connection may be lacking, feel it.
Allow yourself to soak it all in and know I’m along with you for the ride.
You are not alone.
I am not alone.
We are together on this beautiful, and sometimes brutal, journey of motherhood.