Suffering from writers block....so asked my sister to write a post about her life.
Thoughts of my sister! Sharing her post here...
How I became the Best Mom
Being a mother can be difficult at times as you have to be generous and selfless unless it hurts. But every mother wants to ensure their children’s happiness and that they foster success in every aspect of their life. And because of that she starts to become a super mom rather than a super wife, sister or daughter. Their kids remain their first priority and it is quite normal for mothers.
Being a divorced mother, I faced little more challenges then a normal mom. There were times when I was forced to terminate some of my crucial tasks in order to pay more attention to my kids. But today I can proudly say that my kids are better behaved and goal oriented. Following are the few changes that I have made that helped me in parenting my three kids in a better way.
Priorities: For me, my first priority was my kid’s future. I’ve always wanted to make sure that they attend the best school, engage in the challenging curriculums and build lasting and healthy friendships. In order to ensure all of this I’ve lost the sight of my own and I personally eliminate some of personal plans. As a result I was able to make my children more self sufficient. They started to realize their own goals and that is some thing that is worth neglecting my own needs and aspirations. So, it is your priorities that will decide how good a mother you can be.
Boundaries: Along with my priorities I mark some boundaries between them and myself. Although I have the full custody of my kids but I can easily lost my identity among them if I don’t draw a line that should never be crossed. First I force them to accept my separation from my husband by taking a little step back and leaving them behind. This timeout helps them to realize that how important we are for each other. However, I have my mother and step father to baby sit them when I was not around. Today they look forward to spend quality time whenever we are together and this makes our bond even stronger.
My image: Moms are generally more soft as compared to fathers. Ut in my case I have to become their father as well. So, I become a little strict regarding my decisions. But that doesn’t mean that I have started spending nothing on myself or skipped my gym classes because I have no time. I took care of their needs but keep my interests alive as well. I took care of their needs by becoming their mentor, role model and inspiration.
My attitude: Being a single mom I had to deal with my sadness, pessimism and insecurity on my own. I have to fight the situation on my own and hope for a better next day. And to tackle this I decided to keep myself involve in activities that can help me to fight against my fears and to achieve the success that I have always strived for.
My answer: To become a better single mom I trained myself to say no to my kids. At first they found it a little hard to accept but with time they got used to it and now they know what are the limits that they have to take care of. Saying No can be a little hard at times but if you believe that it is not right for your kids then it is better to say no rather then being sorry later.