Think back to the last few conversations you had with another adult. Did you discuss current events, movies, a book you were reading, even the weather? Or was it all about your kids and their activities and accomplishments? If you think conversation is telling people how great your kids are, you might need a life adjustment. I know I need some improvement in this area myself.
A few weeks ago I was a parent volunteer at a school tournament, and I overheard a lot of “conversations” that consisted of people telling other people about their kids.
Here is everything I overheard one guy saying about his son:
He is a champion. He is serious. He is going to get a college scholarship. He wears French cuffs. His 5 suits were all bought at Brooks Brothers. He flies to tournaments. He is confident enough to travel on his own. He has a debit card. He has a car. He has a college visit coming up, and he is prepared for his college visit. He is part of a think tank. He is being unofficially recruited by Harvard, Emory, and Duke. He will probably work in a bank as an adult. He didn’t finish at the top of his last tournament, but it was because the judges didn’t know what they were doing. He has a girlfriend, but he (meaning the dad) isn’t sure it will.
This guy needs to get his own life. Maybe we do too.
The danger signs that we need our own life.
- All our friends are the parents of our kids' friends.
- Our social life depends on our child making the team.
- We spend most weekends at events watching our child perform in some way.
- We say "we" when discussing our child's life.
- People without kids wander away from us at gatherings.
If you answered yes to any of the above, then let's make some adjustments before you or I become a bore, and before our kids head to college leaving us with nothing to talk about or people who care to have a real conversation with us.