Parents, you’ve got questions, we’ve got answers.

Or just as likely, we’ve got questions and you’ve got answers.

Challenge: Romance After Kids

You might be a parent if you use this phrase...

Vote up!
Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Email this article

You might be a parent if…

... you have ever said the phrase, “I’d love to, but I couldn’t get a sitter”.

I’m sure parents don’t think twice about saying these words, but I know many a non-parent that rolls their eyes heavily upon hearing it. The reality of being a parent is that you are at a child’s mercy whether they are your own or your babysitter.

Trying to keep the spark alive in a marriage when you have kids is tough. One of the biggest blockers of intimacy out there is a lack of babysitters/caretakers/wardens. Even if you have one, your bank account may say more 'Netflix and Chill' and less Outback and latest blockbuster. Unless of course it is the newest Disney/Pixar film and then you better believe you are there opening night (or early afternoon matinee if we are being realistic).

In a Facebook conversation my friend Marisa said, “I’d love to go see the latest movie in an actual movie theater”. Preach Mama, preach. Another friend followed up with, “I'd love to get laid”. True story, Katie! Robyn then made an excellent point when she said what I am sure parents have all thought at some point, “I’d love to go to that ‘adults only, no kids party’ that literally everyone else is going to”. But guess what?

I. Don’t. Have. A. Sitter.

I’m positive that non-parents hear this phrase from us and it is met with an entirely different reaction. I was the first in my group of friends to have kids and I wondered sometimes if they thought that I really enjoyed canceling day as on plans or staying at home rather than enjoying tickets I bought to a concert months in advance. Don’t get me wrong, there are days that once the bra comes off I do not want to put it back on. When you’ve been excited for literally weeks to leave the house and interact with grown people, have some non-“Mommy/Daddy” time, and have a reason to put on a bra other than a vain attempt to combat gravity and breastfeeding, Jenny's last minute phone call to casually tell you she has a test she needs to study for hurts worse for me than it does for you. Salt in the wound is when you ask us if our parents can help out and we have to admit that your parents have a better social life than you with plans of their own they won't cancel. As another friend pointed out having to say, “I'd love to go to that concert with you, but you are my sitter!" Is literally the story of my life.

This post comes from the TODAY Parenting Team community, where all members are welcome to post and discuss parenting solutions. Learn more and join us! Because we're all in this together.