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Challenge: Pregnancy and Infant Loss

The pressure behind having a second child is painful

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I remember giving birth to my first child, and hours later being asked if I wanted another one anytime soon.

How long will you wait? Are you trying? Don’t you want a boy? What will you do if you have another girl?

SERIOUSLY?

These are REAL questions ... all that have been asked almost every time I see a family member, old friend, or random person at the grocery store.

While I understand most are just innocently curious, it makes it no easier on moms.

We spend months tracking my menstrual cycle, my ovulation dates, peeing on ovulation sticks, taking a prenatal, and still we get nothing.

Then, we do get something. Twice in a row.

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Each time, weeks later... it’s gone. Like it never even existed.

So I sit here, and I bleed, and I cry, and I question “why me?”

But I still have my first child to care for. So while I struggle in silence, the questions still come up, from everybody around me.

“Are you guys ever going to have another one?”

I have expressed nothing but my sincere interest in bringing another child into this world, so what makes them think I am intentionally not getting pregnant?

You don’t know what I’m going through. You don’t know the pain I’ve endured two times in a row, just to STILL be asked if I was ready for another, while I'm in the process of loss.

I have no explanation for why these things happen. I don’t want pity, and I don’t want those daunting eyes and long hugs at a family gathering.

I want space. I want to let my body and my mind heal in peace.

I prayed for two pink lines. I got several. But I still don’t have a baby.

Please stop asking women when they’re conceiving again, because frankly, it’s not your business.

- Amanda @ mommaeverafter.com

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