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Challenge: Bringing Home Baby: What Do You Wish You’d Known?

Messy = Beautiful...

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When I first saw this blog I read every post and found a common denominator and what I really wish I had known before brining my sweet baby girl home almost 6 months ago.  That is...that looking back at how you were in your early mom days with any thing but compassion and love is a waste.  

I was so confident that I would be the exception to all other moms....that it would come so easy and I would be the picture of perfect motherhood.  I gawked at taking a breast feeding class and insisted that I didn't need to read any books.  I imagined rocking my sweet newborn who never would cry, who I could calm with ease, and who would immediately fit into my world.  

What really happened was a beautiful, wonderful, messy, scary, emotional, and special mess..our mess.  Becoming a mom takes time.  Finding your stride takes time.  What doesn't take time is that undeniable rush of love that I am certain all moms feel.  I loved my Elle so much from the moment I saw her and even after a tough day of acid reflux woes and seeing my baby throw up as I tried to feed her... I would stare at her and just feel a rush of unbelievable love and passion.  Going through the rough beginning made Elle and I stronger, it made my husband and I feel more connected.  Most importantly it made me feel confident that this emotional wuss of a girl could fight back tears as she rocked her baby when she winced in pain when all I wanted to do was cry.  I did cry...a lot... but only when baby wasn't looking. I wanted Elle to know she was protected and we would figure it out.  I can tell now that she felt that and among all my other milestones in life that is my most prideful.  That even though I was a mess, I became a mommy.  

So when people ask me what do I wish I had known, all I can think is there is no way to know how it will be.  And that is what makes parenthood so beautiful.  The experience of becoming a family, finding your confidence, the emotional roller coaster of becoming someone's mommy or daddy.  It is the best thing I have ever done and the hardest...but I wouldn't trade it for the world.  And my husband and I think our cute little Elle is proof that with lots of love the rest will fall into place.

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