When I first saw this blog I read every post and found a common denominator and what I really wish I had known before brining my sweet baby girl home almost 6 months ago. That is...that looking back at how you were in your early mom days with any thing but compassion and love is a waste.
I was so confident that I would be the exception to all other moms....that it would come so easy and I would be the picture of perfect motherhood. I gawked at taking a breast feeding class and insisted that I didn't need to read any books. I imagined rocking my sweet newborn who never would cry, who I could calm with ease, and who would immediately fit into my world.
What really happened was a beautiful, wonderful, messy, scary, emotional, and special mess..our mess. Becoming a mom takes time. Finding your stride takes time. What doesn't take time is that undeniable rush of love that I am certain all moms feel. I loved my Elle so much from the moment I saw her and even after a tough day of acid reflux woes and seeing my baby throw up as I tried to feed her... I would stare at her and just feel a rush of unbelievable love and passion. Going through the rough beginning made Elle and I stronger, it made my husband and I feel more connected. Most importantly it made me feel confident that this emotional wuss of a girl could fight back tears as she rocked her baby when she winced in pain when all I wanted to do was cry. I did cry...a lot... but only when baby wasn't looking. I wanted Elle to know she was protected and we would figure it out. I can tell now that she felt that and among all my other milestones in life that is my most prideful. That even though I was a mess, I became a mommy.
So when people ask me what do I wish I had known, all I can think is there is no way to know how it will be. And that is what makes parenthood so beautiful. The experience of becoming a family, finding your confidence, the emotional roller coaster of becoming someone's mommy or daddy. It is the best thing I have ever done and the hardest...but I wouldn't trade it for the world. And my husband and I think our cute little Elle is proof that with lots of love the rest will fall into place.