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Challenge: Life Changes

I'm Not Afraid to Sing in Public Anymore.

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For me, a first time mom with a 6 month old charmer of a boy, I can note a laundry list of things that have changed since this time last year, when I was a perfectly happy professional woman, wife and overall independent person.

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I stayed out late to see live music, cooked dinner from scratch almost every night of the week, weighed (much) less, exercised (much) more, took 10 mile hikes on weekends and drank real lattes with real espresso and real caffeine. But still, there were things I couldn't, or wouldn't do.

I would never have flashed a stranger in a public place. I would never have sung a bluegrass song, loudly while walking down the street. I would not have snarled or flipped the bird when someone cut me off in traffic, unsafely. I would never have pushed my way to the front of a line or asked someone to hold a door open for me. I would not have used spit to clean another human's face, or been the one to bother a waiter for filtered water or five extra napkins. I would not have advocated for my needs (or my family's needs) so fiercely - I generally went with the flow.

But now, call it parental empowerment, call it necessity, call it impulsiveness with a shot of sleep deprivation - things have changed. There's now, no shame in my mama game!

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I no longer think twice about whipping it out to breastfeed in public (to be fair, I am respectful and cover up my little one to the extent he'll tolerate it). If singing a song, loudly in public is what makes my baby giggle (or not cry), that's what's happening. If we need extra napkins, twice, we'll ask without hesitation or guilt. And if it's bedtime and guests just won't leave the dinner party - I might just kindly kick them out.

It's not about putting our needs before others'. It's about finding a way to do what's right for my family in the context of real life. In fact, I maintain that flexibility is one of the most important traits to instill in a child. I'll

do my best to take opportunities to model what going with the flow looks like, when life doesn't go as planned. And I pray my child is able to adapt and bend as he learns and grows. That said, there are a few new parent mistakes, accommodations made for others at our own expense, that we won't make again.

Never again will we skip weekend naps for social engagements, only to realize this somehow causes the babe somehow to wake up MORE in the night? Or allow bedtime to be pushed back, and back, and back, because visiting grandparents just cant get enough of babe's dimples and giggles, just to be met with a kicking, screaming bedtime routine? Nope. We've learned, and we just won't do it.

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I'm clear about what's right for my new little one and I am not afraid to do what it takes to get him what he needs, and therefore, what I need. It's refreshing, actually, to unapologetically make some decisions without wondering what others might think, and instead act from that deeply ingrained gut feeling we acquire the moment we become parents. So now, without being the slightest bit self-conscious, I sing in public, without fear of judgement or sideways looks - because the baby's laughing, mama's smiling, and that's what matters most.

#tidal

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