I remember very distinctly back to the days when, upon getting into my car, no sooner did my door close, my hand was already on the volume button turning up whatever song happened to be a favorite at the time. The tune, melodically carrying me along, until I reached my desired destination and I went on with my day. And while I’m sure I daydreamed a bit, the music was front and center, the focal point of my rested mind.
This ancient memory came to me after driving yesterday because of its almost humorous nostalgia; the stark contrast it cast on my current life. Let’s set the scene:
After getting both kids dressed (my oldest out of his pajamas and into school clothes, my youngest into his second set of clothes for the day after he spit up his oatmeal no less than 3 times — and all by 8:45), I navigated to our shoe cabinet (yes, we have to keep shoes on lock down like razor blades at a CVS, for fear our littlest one will devour their unsavory soles). Then it’s the overwhelmingly important decision of picking out the hat choice of the day (Spider-Man, Batman or 49ers, respectively). A reminder to grab the lunchbox on the way to the car, and we’re getting all strapped in for the car ride ahead. But wait — I forgot the sunscreen. Back into the garage to lather them with their daily dose of SPF’s and we’re once again on our way. However, by this time, little brother has decided he’s over his hand-held Mozart piano and is in hot pursuit to find the next toy of enticement.
Did I send out my invoice for my newest client? Coastal is having their buy one, get one sale on glasses and it ends today. Shoot! I’ve got to call my eye doctor and get my prescription so I can order them! I must remember to pick up the gift for our birthday party this weekend. Speaking of, it’s only 17 days until Hudson’s party…I really need to make a list of design ideas and appetizers for his party. I’ll go on Pinterest. I need to do some outreach for one of my clients on Pinterest today, too. Darn Pinterest and your ridiculously cute and stupidly unattainable ideas for everything — why can’t I be more creative like my sister? Oh no! I forgot to call her back — twice! Her little ones have birthdays coming up too! Add birthday cards to my list for Target. When should I go to target, before or after naps today? Hmm, if after, then traffic will be terrible, but then at least I’ll have a few minutes of modified solitude since I’ll be driving and unavailable to be climbed on like a jungle gym or play assistant to Hudson in the formation of farm animals made of play dough. Add wine to the list.
This was my internal monologue. Our car ride to school is 6 minutes. And while there was no radio on, the thoughts were so absolutely deafening, it was as if I were blasting AC/DC for the whole neighborhood to hear. In fact, I wonder if there is a slight humming sound that emits from my head like that of a refrigerator cooling itself down. It amazes me how all-consuming our lives can be when our mind is on over-drive. How truly loud our thoughts are when there are so many circulating at once.
So while most days I don’t have the luxury of pumping my favorite play list, at least I’m melodically reminded that my life is full, and my heart even fuller.