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Challenge: Bullying Hurts

Dear Kindergarten Bully

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Dear Kindergarten Bully,

My daughter has expressed for months the havoc you reap on her little heart each week. You have physically backed her into corners with your intense stature—I think to confirm to her you are in charge. You have told her to go away when she has approached you in kindness, you have whispered to others to exclude her, you have made her feel unwelcome and unloved in so many ways.

But somehow my daughter presses on to win your approval.

We have told our daughter it is not about who she is, we have told her something in your life must be sad and you choose to release that hurt on to others. My heart truly aches for you with a mother’s love, I know something in your life is causing you despair because hurting people hurt others. I do not believe your parents are intentionally raising you to be a bully, but your behavior is full of anger and behind that I anger I know you have sorrow.

We pray for you every night, we pray whatever is going on in your life causing you sorrow is healed. My daughter has taken this prayer earnestly, she has taken it into action. On her own she initiated a plan called Operation cheer up “Lucy”— my daughter laid out her plan saying if she shows you kindness every day eventually you will not be sad and then you will stop being unkind to her. I was both proud and heartbroken at my daughter’s plan. I know you need kindness shown to you, but I also know there is something deeper in your life that my little one can’t solve for you.

For a few weeks my daughter came home stating her plan was in full effect but not yet working, you were still unleashing mayhem on my girl’s heart but she never showed any sign of condemnation, she never had any tone of vengeance in her voice when she continued to tell us your unkindness had not wavered, instead my daughter was even more eager to make sure to show you kindness, my daughter was more fervent than ever to put a smile on your face.

Last night I came home to my daughter clutching a business card, playing with it, reading it over and over, she was clutching this card as if it were her prized possession. I asked to see what she had and it was simply a restaurant business card. I asked her where it came from and she stated you gave it to her today.

You gave my daughter a business card—likely a restaurant your mom or dad works at or owns. My daughter said you gave her that card as a gift. She played with the card for hours, never letting it leave her side, she set it on her nightstand at bedtime. The small 4×2 piece of paper would be just a card to most people—something I likely would have thrown away—but to my daughter this card was a sign her plan was showing success, a sign your heart was healing, a sign that her prayers are being answered.

We will continue to pray for healing the sadness in your life, we will pray you feel love from everyone around you. We hope you see the unwavering kindness of our daughter—who no matter how you react—will continue her plan for Operation cheer up “Lucy” each day as long as she is in your life.

(Note: the child’s name has been changed)

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