No matter how much advice you received before having kids, none of it really prepared you for the reality of parenthood. They tell you that it is difficult, but you only fully understand how difficult it can be when you have children of your own.
Throw a small business in the mix which you run and you advance to a whole other level of insane. When I started my business, I was excited and nervous at the same time. That soon turned to anxiety when I realized how much of an impact my absence was having on my family, but specifically my kids.
I saw the sign
My kids would always run to me with their problems. Sure, their father was there and they also went to him, but I was their go-to parent whenever things weren’t going great. Don’t get me wrong; their father is amazing and would do anything for them, but nothing soothes a heart like a mother’s compassion.
After I started my business though, I got so caught up in the running and growing it through various new plans, that I started to live past my kids. It dawned on me that I was missing out on them when they didn’t turn to me for comfort anymore.
To tell you the truth, I was kinda jealous of my husband. They started to choose him to confide in and left me in the dark. I knew I needed to bring back the balance and started to change things around.
Don’t be a control freak
In the beginning, I wanted to be in control of everything. I had to make sure that everything was perfect. I failed to see that there were amazing and capable people around me who I could delegate to. It was a trust issue that I needed to settle.
My kids made me see the light and I started to delegate more work. It was scary at first, but I soon realized that my fears were ungrounded. I even involved a third-party company for product innovation and that proved to be a wise decision.
Let your yes be yes
When I look back at it now, I can understand why my kids started to turn to their father for help. Whenever a crisis arose, I jumped, no matter what I was doing or how much my kids needed me at the time. I justified my actions by saying to myself that everything I did was for them.
If I am honest with myself, that was a lie and all I really wanted was for my business to succeed. My kids started to feel distant from me and I made a choice to stick to my word. My family was my first priority, to begin with. If I lost touch with them, then the business would mean nothing.
There is no ‘I’ in team
I realized that although I was the one who needed to run the business, my whole family was impacted by it. Instead of treating the two as two separate things, I started to involve my kids in the business as well. Sure, they didn’t do the books or anything hectic, but getting them involved helped us spend more time together.
After a couple of hectic months, we have gotten past the worst of it all. I came to realize that my kids were way more important than any entrepreneurial venture that I could start.
If I gained all the riches in the world but lost my kids, it would have all been for naught. Being an entrepreneur and a parent can be challenging, but it is also very rewarding. You just need to find a balance between the two.