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Challenge: WHO Are You?

Adoption and the Miraculous Chance to Love

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My husband and I had been married for two years when we decided to start trying to have a child. My younger sister already had two children and I was very excited to start trying for a child of my own.

After four years of trying to fall pregnant and going the in vitro route where many medical professionals tried to help me conceive, I felt a sense of complete helplessness. It was a bitter pill to swallow, but I had to accept it.

We start talking about adoption

Fortunately, the whole process made our marriage stronger and we could even laugh over some of the situations that came with my infertility. For instance, some medical texts related to infertility were so difficult to understand with all the Latin words that we required Latin translation to understand them.

We began talking about the possibility of adoption as the idea of not having children was intolerable. My only hesitation came from a feeling that I may not love an adopted child as much as a biological one.

We made the decision to approach an adoption agency and put down our names. It was a long 18 months wait before we received the call. A woman who was seven months pregnant with a girl had chosen us.

We talked with the birth mother several times over the phone. Although the conversations were a bit awkward, it was obvious that she wanted the best for her baby and was in such difficult circumstances she saw no other option but to give her up for adoption.

The mother goes into labor

When we received a call that the birth mother was in labor, we drove to the hospital as fast as we could. My emotions were mixed because I couldn’t help wondering whether she would change her mind about the adoption at the last minute and we would have to make the drive home without a baby.

Another fear was that I would see the baby and not feel any bond with her because she hadn’t grown inside my body. It was also the first time we would actually meet the birth mother and I wondered what she would think of us.

Love at first sight

Eventually, we arrived at the hospital and the mother was still in labor. We could sit with her and offer our support. After a few hours, a healthy baby girl announced her appearance with a loud cry.

Now came that crucial time when the birth mother saw her daughter for the first time and faced that heartrending decision of having to give her up. Would she change her mind?

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As soon as I saw the baby, I felt the first pangs of love and didn’t know whether I would be able to face the disappointment if the mother decided to keep her. She stuck to her decision and we left the hospital with our precious daughter.

I couldn’t believe that I had ever had doubts about being able to love her. As I took care of her, I would stop and just stare at her face, not believing that she was really ours. It was no different for my husband who adored his daughter from day one. We both felt compelled to hold her, hug her and kiss her all the time.

When our daughter came into our lives, it changed us forever. Being parents to her has had its challenges at times but we never fail to look back on that day we brought her into our home as the greatest of miracles.

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