Ever notice it’s easier to list the many ways you may be failing as a mom than to point out all the ways you are doing a great job in the motherhood department? Do you find it hard to say you are a great mom and even harder to say it without uttering a single BUT in that sentence? Why are we so conditioned to focus on our flaws?
I will admit I’m not the most humble person out there especially with my inner circle, and yet when it comes to motherhood I have second guessed myself left and right. I rarely say “I rock at this” without a BUT following that statement. I bet you do the same except you probably don’t even use the words “I rock.” Well guess what? You do. You rock.
I’ve gotten to virtually meet many amazing moms in online support groups and as a blogger, and I know some personally; women who are warriors and conquer every day despite personal struggles. Moms dealing with long-term medical issues, or challenging kids, or autism, or postpartum, or who are doing it all alone. Twins moms with multiple kids who are constantly doing a juggling act and still find a way to laugh and help others. I’m in awe of all these moms, and it reminds me that some of us have it much harder, and those moms need all the encouragement they can get. The one thing that binds us all together is our constant struggle to do the best we can. Yet we judge ourselves harshly.
With Mother’s Day fast approaching, we should use this time to reflect on all the ways we rock at this motherhood thing, because well most days, I think we all do, one way or another.
So I challenge you all to tell me why you are a great mom without uttering a single BUT in your sentence. Here is my attempt and the top 10 reasons why I think I’m a great mom.
1. I enjoy it.
I went through a lot of heartbreak to earn the mommy title so I don’t take it for granted. My infertility struggles gave me a profound appreciation for motherhood, I wear my mom badge proudly. Do I miss getting out of the house at the drop of a hat? Yes. I just don’t miss the person I used to be pre kids. That person didn’t have a purpose, she always felt like she was missing something. As a mom i feel more complete. It also helps that my twins are at a fun age, that sweet spot between babyhood and the terrible twos.
2. I’m a reluctant chef.
I hate cooking with a passion. I wish I had inherited the ‘I love spending hours in the kitchen dirtying every pan on sight’ gene. Alas it’s not there, not even an ounce. For my Twinkies I am willing to become a chef and cook elaborate meals that I would have never attempted before they came along. Although right now they are not exactly enthusiastic or thankful about this particular sacrifice of mine, those little ingrates!
3. I willingly became a milking cow.
And I’m still milking away! Had someone told me I would be nursing this long I would have told them they were crazy. And yet here I am still doing it. I’m proud of this accomplishment especially considering all I went through to make it happen.
4. I’m playful.
I love playing with my sons. Tickling them, chasing them, playing hide and seek or horsey (I’m usually the horsey), and generally just hanging out on the floor with them.
5. I’m silly
I will do anything to make them laugh. I will make funny voices when I read a book or just in general. I love it when I stumble on something that has them laughing silly. Like the time I sang the alphabet in a mock opera voice, Ian was in stitches. Or the time I made silly faces and Sam was almost crying he was laughing so hard, there’s even a video of it.
6. I take them out.
Even though it’s a production and a half that ends up with me drenched in sweat, rushing like a mad woman to get them fed, changed, dressed to get out the door, and then rushing back home to make sure they don’t miss their nap and well let’s be honest to avoid double meltdowns; I still get them out of the house. It would be easier to stay home especially when the effort to get out takes longer than the time we are actually out, but I love seeing how happy it makes them. Bonus points, mamma can get herself an overly priced fattening Starbucks Frappucino along the way, thank God for drive through!
7. I make memories.
I love planning weekend outings and family vacations. Our first one was to Mexico and they were 15 months old at the time. We are planning on taking them to Portugal this summer. It’s not easy to travel with toddlers but it’s worth it, especially when it exposes them to other cultures and teaches them to be flexible and adapt to changes and new environments.
8. I write about them
I record all the milestones and the firsts. I’m extremely lucky that I get to be there for all of these, and I want to capture it all. I’m that over sharer on Facebook that will post a million posts about my twins because I don’t want to forget a thing. When they are 10 years old and want to know about their babyhood and mamma will be in her 50s and probably going senile, I want to be able to look back and show them with a few simple clicks of a mouse.
9. I’m a mammarrazi.
I take so many pictures throughout the day, you might as well call me mammarrazi! There is not a moment I don’t try to capture. Can you guess how many pictures I have taken to date? I’ll give you a hint, it’s way higher than 5000. In fact, the number is so high that my MacBook Pro is slow as molasses!
10. I show my love
Seems like a no brainer but I think it’s an important one. I tell them I love them every day. I constantly kiss and snuggle them, especially when i know there will come a time they will want nothing to do with mamma, so I soak it all up while I can. When they learn something new I praise them, I want to make sure I only encourage and lift them up. I want to show them what affection is and raise them to be sweet caring men.
That’s my list, what’s yours? I would love to hear your top 10, or top 5 or whatever you would like to share.
Remember ladies we are all great moms no ifs and buts about it!